Pieces

I often compare my life to one of those 5,000 piece jigsaw puzzles. Every once in awhile, out of the blue, God hands me another piece. If you've ever tried to complete one of these puzzles, you'll understand exactly what I'm talking about... You see, some of the pieces have bright colors, defined outlines, and I know exactly where they fit into my life picture. Other pieces aren't so clear and when handed to me I often ask God if He's made a mistake. The strange shape or darkness of a particular piece confuses me. Just like those dark, difficult times that leave us confused as to why this is happening to us or why God will allow it.

But I have come to realize two important things about those pieces. Sometimes the meaning of those dark pieces are immediately clear, even if we don't want them to be (I.e. a change in jobs that is difficult but will lead to great possibilities.) Other times those confusing, dark pieces must humbly be set aside and God will eventually show you exactly where they go, even if it's years later. (i.e Sexual abuse transformed into a ministry to help others who have experienced a similar situation.) And then there are those pieces God uses  merely as connection pieces to bridge other life events and pieces of your life puzzle together; difficult yet extremely necessary.

I am thankful for all the little pieces I have stashed away in my pocket, both good and bad. Some I look at so confused but completely trusting God to work into my puzzlee in some amazing way for His glory. And other pieces, I get so excited about that they seem to want to jump out of my pocket at every possible opportunity! But each piece, I must patiently wait for the perfect time to let God use.

So far this blog has been all about pieces. My life has been all about pieces. But I feel Him moving, pulling things together now and I'm more excited than you could imagine! I can't wait for you to experience all these puzzle pieces coming together in my life with me!

"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose." ~Romans 8:28~

Books & Bananas

You might remember the little story of the "banana boy;" a young boy in Uganda who I became friends with a few months ago. (His story is titled "Fruit of the Spirit" if you'd like to read his story in how he stole my heart.) Not only did this kid steal my heart, but I received many emails from friends and family at home telling me how he touched their hearts in some way. After I posted, expressing my desiree to somehow get this amazingly brilliant child back in school, I was contacted by two sisters in the US who eagerly wanted to make an impact and pay for Ashiraf's schooling. I was overwhelmed with joy! I spent my last full day in Uganda arranging Ashiraf's schooling...

Every Ugandan I introduced Ashiraf to expressed to me how important it would be to get this 8 year old back in school. He's whitty. He's brilliant. And most of all he has a spirit that screams determination to change the world. A good friend happily agreed to do whatever he could to get this boy back in school. This intailed visiting with Ashiraf's step mother, a Muslim women who spoke no English, visiting the school where Ashiraf was previously enrolled, and spending the day going back and forth from Walukuba to Jinja with 3 people packed on one boda (motor cycle taxi.) But by the end of the day, we ALL went to bed with a smile on our faces. School fees had been paid thanks to the love of "strangers" in the US, whose hearts were touched and tugged by the Holy spirit to act in even the simplist of ways to help one of God's children on the other side of the world. Every time I think about it I am overwhelmed with joy & love. The $200 donated not only put Ashiraf back in school, but paid for his books, and a meal plan (dinner had been his only meal every day.)

Ashiraf's school term ended after I returned home. He still sells bananas after school a few days a week. My friend is able to catch up with him from time to time so I get a frequent update on how Ashiraf is doing... out of a class of 83 students, my favorite little banana boy finished the term as #3 in his entire class!!! Tears form every time I tell someone this. Lol I'm like a proud mama who can't wait to see what becomes of this kid and how God will use him to impact Uganda.

Don't ever think that you can't make an impact. Your small donation, your prayers, your fundraisers, they make a difference. He hasn't called all of us to go to foreign lands to spread the love of Jesus, so I am happy & excited to work as an ambassador for my community. God is still working y'all and I know it won't be long until I'm back with Ashiraf and all the other beautiful children of Uganda.

"Home"

I've been "home" for over three months and haven't written a post. I just didn't know how or even what to say. Yesterday I found this scribbled in one of my personal notebooks, ink running in certain places as a result of tears that fell on the pages while writing. Hopefully it will help you understand where my heart has been...

March 15th, 2014

Two days home and I'm already unsure of where I am. I wake up in the middle of the night completely confused.

I drove today and felt completely  backwards on the other side of the road. It took everything in me not to cut people off or drive in the grass around them like I've been expected to do for the past 6 months.

I stopped at Barnes & Noble where I  ordered an extremely overpriced coffee.  B&N used to be my little place of refuge when I was home when I longed for a little  peace in my soul.  I strolled around the store that I'd been in a hundred times before, but now I felt lost. The bright shiny book covers overwhelmed me. Whatever they were holding in the pages behind them, the "secrets to life," did it really matter?

Somehow I found myself in the "Travel" section. My eye shifted through the names of foreign countries written in bold fonts down the spines of the thick books. As my eyes only browsed, my heart was searching desperately. It wasn't there. No map, no book. Did it even exist? Is Uganda a place I dreamed up in my own mind that nobody here even knows about?

People ask me questions all the time, but then only half listen to the answer. Do they really care? And sometimes it's not the questions that  get to me. "I bet you're so happy to be home," they say, not even asking but telling me, because who could ever find happiness in a small little land-locked country in Africa? What "privileged" American girl could ever stay in a 3rd world country any longer than a few weeks without wanting to run back to her Starbucks coffee and Ugg boots?

I started crying right there in the middle of the Travel section of Barnes & Noble because it now hit me, I wasn't in my little Uganda anymore. And the little haven I thought I had here suddenly turned into a place just like the rest, a place that wasn't Uganda. I wiped away the tears and kept walking. I walked past the window and caught a glimpse of my sparkly polished self in it's reflection. Just a few days ago I was knee  deep in red dirt, helping remove jiggers from little feet in the village and now here I am drinking designer coffee with a face full of makeup.

Readjusting is going to be much more difficult than I thought...